There are times when I’m actually being force to make a ‘false’ decision. Times like that happen always make me do decision that I do not agree with and was forced to stick with it for a short period of time. Sometimes they does it in order to make things convenient for us, but other hand it makes us putting up a false face. Sometimes it makes me uncomfortable because I have to lie in order to follow the instructions, but at the same time, this is the orders that you have to follow. What to do at situations like this?
An example was this:
We have a group discussion about accountability partner, and how we were advised to get one to keep track on our daily life and to make sure things were going on smoothly. Well in my heart this is what I thought. “okay okay i’ll find one when I get to know one…” But the next thing she say “since we are all here, lets find your accountability partner”
The 1st thing came to my mind was, “what?” I’m not a person who’ll go and say to a total strangers “hey lets be accountability partner!” Before I could say anything everyone was like looking at each other and pointing at each other using eye contact. My mind was “okay…they done it so easily, but how bout me?” I seriously cant just go up to a person and pet him on the back asking them to be something like that. there is no sense of attratchment or thing that make us the same, for me to open up to tell them about anything.
Totally nothing. If I cant open up to them, I cant tell them anything. none of them over there is a potential “accountability partner” to me. “What to do?” I was wondering.
At the end of the day I decided to just be with one of them “for the day activity”
I told her just for that day, and she agreed. The truth she already has one, but just for that day, I join them.
The truth Is, I have not (even until this day ) had an accountability partner to walk with me in my christen walk. I indeed I cant say I don’t need one. But the fact is I simply cant open up to someone I know for a day or two. It had to be a person I know maybe almost my entire life, or at least someone who will understand me and give me sounding advise base on bible concept and not the worldly concept. It must be someone who can give me advise without angering me, or to irritate me when he or she is around. someone who know the best way to approach the topic, stern but not too stern
I believe that one person is somewhere out there. It can’t be any one normal, it has to be one. But I’ll have to keep finding, and searching till I found that “one”. Should I continue with my attempt of finding that “one” or should I give up and give in to anyone who is around to be my accountability partner
